Only child or lonely child?

Single children exhibit characteristics of their own, but can their behavioural patterns definitely be generalized?

Feeling alone because you’re the only kid? Well, heads up, because you might just be part of a world wide phenomenon called the Little Emperor Syndrome. No, it neither has anything to do with being royal nor is it a disease. Little Emperor Syndrome or One Child Syndrome (OCS) is when parents decide to have just one child in their family. And who can blame them, considering the fact that education, although a necessity, has become unaffordable? With prices sky rocketing and competition getting fierce, parents now prefer to have only one child so he can have the best of everything. However, there’s a certain quality about a single child’s personality that is interesting. Having grown up alone without a sibling, single kids are not too keen on sharing. They are possessive about things and usually prefer playing alone. They tend to create a world of their own which is why single kids are generally creative. Says Preethi, a single child, “Sharing doesn’t come naturally to me as I never had to at home! It was just me growing up, so the thought of giving my things to someone else has never occurred to me.” We cannot blame Preethi for this trait as it’s something that she has acquired unconsciously. For most single children, sharing doesn’t come naturally. Many psychologists have come up with theories which state that in the case of a sibling, the first born is usually “dethroned” once the second kid is born. However, in the case of a single child, he/she is the sole beneficiary of everything, all the time. Does it mean we can stereotype a single child’s behaviour? Sangeetha Makesh, who holds a Phd in Applied Psychology (marriage and family), refutes this claim, saying, “It’s a stereotype that has to be broken. There is no truth to it. As a psychologist, I believe that behaviour depends on a child’s upbringing.” She goes on to say that even a child with siblings can be spoilt and arrogant. She suggests that parents talk more to single children to keep them connected and also expose the child to various situations. “It is absolutely necessary for the child to learn how to react in some situations. It’s the only way he/she will learn,” she says. Most single kids can’t take ‘no’ for an answer from their parents. “We call it Mental Health Insurance. And that is very important for single kids.”

S I N G L E D O U T

Signature traits of single children:

• Sensitive to disapproval and highly self-critical.

• Are strong-willed, stubborn and persistent. This can change them positively too.

• Are possessive of belongings and have a high need for privacy.

• They have a strong sense of wrong and right and tend to overanalyze things.